#125
2025 in a nutshell
Hello, again :)
Since I last wrote, almost two years ago, much has changed. However, much also remains the same because here I am again—single as ever!—with a positively twisted desire to document my hopelessly romantic quest for love.
Have I discovered and confronted relational habits and patterns I was previously unaware of? Yes. Have I learned and pivoted and grown as a result, each time being rewarded with (slightly) better quality men, therefore proving I must be making progress? Yes! Have I ignored red flags and wasted time on a few bozos because I was weak and would sometimes accept mere crumbs of affection rather than hold out for the full, decadent meal I know I deserve because hungering for love can feel a lot like literal starvation and surely something is better than nothing? Yes, that too.
Here’s to being a lifelong learner, I suppose. In any case, I am more or less back.
After ~6 peaceful months of Monk Mode, I decided to “get back out there” around March 2025, and thus naturally redownloaded Hinge and Feeld. Now that I no longer write real-time updates like some sick freak, the following recounting of the men I dated over the last year and a half relies mostly on memory, aided in part by my Google Calendar, phone records, and Swarm check-ins. Let’s begin.
~APRIL 2025~
The Art Teacher (Hinge)
We shared three pleasant dates (1. Coffee & a stroll, 2. Movie & froyo, 3. Dinner at his place). They were all very nice but we realized on the third date that we had no chemistry. We mutually never spoke again, and I truly wish him the best.
The English Teacher (Hinge)
His profile photos made it hard to fully decipher his face, which meant I was rolling the dice on whether or not he was cute. He ended up being less attractive than I was hoping for and, unrelatedly, a very mediocre dinner date ensued. To make matters worse, I was forced to pay half when the bill came. My fault for agreeing to dinner on a first date! (Rookie mistake, smh. This monk was clearly out of practice.) However, the restaurant was tasty and I’ve been meaning to return.
The Artist who built a tiny house (Feeld)
When I arrived at the coffee shop, he appeared older than I had expected/hoped, so we weren’t off to a great start. However, we got coffee and proceeded to embark on a semi-treacherous hike that gave us something else to focus on. Very nice guy, but another one-date-only.
The Triplet (Feeld)
From the very beginning, I could tell he was a fuckboy. And yet? He was absurdly persistent (and funny and scary smart) so I eventually agreed to meet him. It also turned out that we have the same birthday (I’m exactly 3 years older), so how could I resist? (He joked that if we ended up together, we’d have to have a 4-way birthday celebration with his triplet sisters. Can you imagine anything worse?)